Hchom Sale: The Daggers of Öσ

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I’ve been wanting to do this Hchom sale for a long, long time, but it was difficult to plan, reliant on several weeks’ access to the appropriate power tools and sawdust-friendly work space. This year I’ve finally made it happen: carved wooden daggers with the full fantasy trappings. In my attendant fiction, these daggers were forged by the Immortal Goblin Smith Öσ (I’m pronouncing it “Od”, but do as you will) who sold his sight in exchange for mastery of his craft. They were presented as gifts to five kings who were cursed to wield no metal as punishment for their endless warring. (Unfortunately I’m not actually a master smith, but maybe we can all pretend together).

I’ve made a temporary page with all the details – you can click here (or on the new icon to the right) to visit it.

As well as the big dagger packs, I’ve put together some illustration packs in the $50-70 range. Since I was already making block prints to include in the dagger booklets, I re-printed a couple copies of an old sleeping mouse linoblock, and you can find those in the options as well. As always, everyone gets a sketch with their package – just let me know what you’d like to see. Email me (marianchurchland@gmail.com) to purchase packs, or ask questions.

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Food Pyramid

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I put this up on Tumblr last week, but it really belongs on Hchom. What we have here, of course, is my own version of the government-approved food pyramid of the 80’s and 90’s. For anybody not familiar, the idea is that the bottom rung represents the food you’re supposed to eat in the largest quantities, ascending to the foods you’re supposed to eat in the smallest quantities. I’ll spare you guys my rant about how stupid I think the original was (and is), but individual and ever-changing food pyramids are a different thing entirely.

What does mine contain? WELL. The bottom level is obviously all breads and muffins and scones and stuff, followed one tier up by various desserts (the distinction between these two might be a little fuzzy, but nevermind). Then fine choccy, of course, then fruit, and by fruit I mean mostly apples. Then coffee and tea (which probably should have been lower down, if I’m being honest). Then last of all, the top tier changes month by month depending on what silly thing I’m fixating on. At the moment it’s those stupid, trendy (expensive, argh) green juices that I used to mock, but now crave constantly god damn it.

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Adventure Season 2

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I’ve reached that point midway through summer where all I can do is flop about from one petulant heap to another and whine (whiiiiine!) about how the never ending sunshine is melting my flesh and my eyes. Go die in a fire yourself, giant death orb! I can’t openly complain about it as much as I’d like, or my friends and family (and the fair folk of Middle Earth) will start to shun me, so I’m trying to find distractions that will pull me through until September. Yesterday I unlaced and cleaned my leather shoes and boots – regardless of whether they needed it or not (what most of them need are new soles). Then I systematically tried on and admired my wool jackets and my overcoat. Today I’m doing this Fall adventures post.

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Goblin Tea

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Jean Jacket

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Once, in a bygone age, I bought new jackets like they were no big deal. New jacket? Pshaw. Three jackets a year, at least, and time let me play and be golden in the mercy of his means. But a new jacket means more to me now, and I have to consider very carefully how it’s going to fit into my wardrobe, and what I’m going to wear it with, and so on.

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Birthday List

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Lo and behold, my birthday is in just over two weeks. So here’s my – what is it – fourth annual Hchom birthday list? Who can keep track, they all look more or less the same.

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Curiosity Objects

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This illustration (the original line art, at any rate) is up right now at the Gallery 33 in Amsterdam, as part of their Cabinet show. The show runs until the 20th of June, so if you’re the sort of fortunate human being who lives in or around Amsterdam, then you should go have a look.

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Moss

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My dear old Moss died last week. What a fine, weird creature he was. I’m happy that he made it all the way through his life, to be a tottery old man who snarled at puppies and stole butter from tabletops.

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Vancouver Update

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I’ve updated the Vancouver page with more places, and added categories to keep it from becoming too dense (of course “shinies and chocolate” makes perfect sense as a single category – don’t you dare question it). A few last additions are yet to come, but we’re getting there. I might need a “Bread” subsection before I’m through.

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Midwinter Want List

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Here’s a quick midwinter want list. Let’s bang it out, so I can crawl into my sickbed and sleep nearly forever.

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Recommendations #1: Southern Field Industries

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This is the first in a new series of recommendation posts, otherwise known as… why am I typing this, it’s so bad… recHCHOMmendations.

I never tire of my myriad wants (Pies: still want them. Pricey jackets that all look the same: still want them), but they get repetitive after a while. Or at least they must, to other people. But I’m also quite pleased with many of the things I already own, and I’d like to think that I know my way around fine, day-to-day objects – if nothing else, I’m the world’s leading expert on what I like best. So now I will share some of those things.

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Vancouver

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Just a quick post, to point out that I’ve finally updated the Vancouver section. I’ll add more places at length, but here is a nice, hefty start.

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Classes

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I’ve been doing an odd thing, over the last year or two; I’ve started to create mage characters in videogames, and not just as an afterthought on some bored fourth play-through, but for actual preference. This might sound like an “odd thing” only in the sense of “why the hell is this worth mentioning”, but if you are like me, and prefer to express your complex personhood via well-ruled-out fantasy conventions, then you will understand that a change of class is like a change of identity.

Since I must compact things into nice, tidy theories, I have noticed that this class-switching happens roughly once a decade. When I was a teenager, I invariably went for the warrior-type. In my twenties, it was always a thief. I’m embarrassed to say that during these eras, I viewed mages as the default girl-class, as if that was a terrible, shameful thing to be avoided at all costs. So now my sudden interest feels almost subversive. Like, ooh, a mage, can I get away with it? Will nobody stop this brazen act of rebellion? Will I be able to find robes that don’t look like a prom dress?

Maybe my theory will hold another decade, and it will all come full circle. I like to imagine myself at 40, going a little overboard with the shield-bash. Or maybe at that point, we transcend the basic classes, and get into rangers and paladins and other shady stuff. We’ll see. In the meantime, here are some character class-exemplifying goblins. I’m not sure why a thief would have a falcon – I just wanted to draw one.

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Grey Dogs

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I know it’s supposed to be “black dogs”, for depression, but grey dogs match all my clothes.

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Birthday List

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My sister has reminded me of my duty, and demanded a birthday list. So here goes.

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