My current wants have naturally coalesced into a want list, so here it is.
1. First of all – and maybe one or two of you can actually give me your advice about this – I’ve decided that I want to learn how to play the viola. But even if I can manage to get my hands on an instrument, there’s still no way I can pay for lessons, which leaves me teaching myself.
In my far-flung fantasies, of course, I’m a latent virtuoso! Ha ha… In my more reasonable but still pretty unreasonable fantasies, I pluck my way along until I’m a kind of hedge-violist who can play some Chrono Trigger songs almost well.
Realistic best case scenario, my neighbours hate me for the next several years, but are kind enough not to call building management. Realistic worst case scenario, it’s a decorative hunk of wood forever representing my shame and failure, and my family never listens to my gift requests ever again.
2. You know what doesn’t require me to develop new skills, though? Shoes. I always need shoes. My feet are made of razors (current working theory). I’d like some bright red sneakers, and I still wish I could get those Dries Van Noten Derbies. They don’t even have to be shiny silver. I’m not picky.
3. I want oat cakes. But better oat cakes than you can get from a box, at least in my boxed oatcake experience (which is extensive).
4. And I really want some kind of, I don’t know, triple strength ginger ale. I have a high resistance to everything in the ginger/horseradish/wasabi family (are they actually a family?), so normal ginger ale just tastes like sugar water.
5. I guess the coat comes next. I didn’t arrange my list very well. Anyway, I haven’t bought a winter coat in nearly a decade, so it seems like a reasonable thing to want. I’d go with a men’s overcoat, one size too large, in the same navy-black as every other piece of outerwear I own.
6. Alice Oswald has a new poetry collection coming out late next summer, and I’m so excited. Jumping up and down and batting at dust motes excited. That’s almost an entire year away, however, so wants being wants, I’d like to have a copy right here, right now.
7. And a shiny, of course. There are rules about this. Quartz crystals with various inclusions (hematite, chlorite, etc.) are the shinies of the moment.
8. Tiny animals. Brandon and I used to get little plastic ones for each other, but we exhausted all the really good options, and now I’ve gone further into the dark to find people who make custom creatures out of porcelain. There’s no end to the weird nerdy shit I could commission from these unsuspecting strangers.






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